Search engine optimisation (SEO). Everyone wants to know about it. Even if they really don't.

Because, surely, there are more interesting things we can do with our time. But I guess (she says begrudgingly) if you want to be found easily on Google (or other popular search engines) it's probably not a bad idea to know the lay of the land.

Then, if you wish, you can reject all these SEO tips outright and focus on being more interesting.

Note: Being interesting online is good for your SEO. 

Second note: If you're unsure what search optimisation means, read my previous post, SEO: True Meanings and Confessions

Let's start with what I call 'The Devil'

Another word for The Devil: the keyword. And to confuse things, key phrases (i.e. more than one word) are also called keywords. 

Keywords are what other people will type in the Google search box to find websites that cover a particular criteria. Ideally, you want these words to appear on your site so they match with the kinds of searches your target market is likely to make…all to find someone special like you.

It's supposed to work like this: Your potential customer taps in a word or two, clicks on 'search' and voila! There you are, on the very first page (ideally), waiting to greet them.

An aside: Why my bad press on keywords?

My personal distaste for keywords stems from the bizarre communication contortion that people embrace for the sake of good ranking. They can spoil creative communication, and even straight-up clear writing. Keywords can be party-poopers in the fun park of message giving.

Admittedly, people are starting to find ways to use them for good and not evil. 

My distaste also stems from that fact that I am number phobic. Ascertaining the right keywords is a numbers game. As you are about to find out…

What keywords are best for you?

Let's use an example. Say you want to set up a website that sells meditation books and CDs via your site's online store. This means you are creating an online business, so ranking will be rather important for moving your merchandise as well as your chi.

‘Meditation’ is an obvious keyword to focus on – or so you would think. Of course, 'meditation' will appear on your site, but the term is very general. And so it attracts a massive number of sites on Google. In fact, 27,400,000 searches came up for that word when I last looked.

How do I know? Because at the top right hand side of the Google results page (under the Google logo and search box) is a light blue bar that gives you these results.

27,400,00 search results is called 'insanely large competition'. The enlightenment industry is humming like a plague of bumblebees on heat. In other words, be prepared to get buried somewhere on page 37 (i.e. the outer reaches of the Google universe).

So what's the answer?

The Goldilocks theory 

This is where having a ‘niche’ is handy. What you want are keywords that are not too big (because of that 'insane competition' problem) but also not too small (i.e. no one would dream of typing it in to search for it). So we are shooting for: not too big, not too small, just right.

‘Home meditation’ is getting better niche-wise but still pretty competitive (20,100,000 searches came up), perhaps also ‘DIY meditation’ (1,010,000 comes up for this term). ‘Guided mediation’ brings 734,000 searches.

'Guided meditation cd' is better at 192,000. ‘Guided meditation audio’ is also smaller at 168,000 searches. So these two are much better than just silly old 'meditation'.

Getting the picture?

Proper keyword finding tools

Looking at the numbers on the results bar after a Google search is one way to get a rough gist. To get a better gist you can use Google's Adwords Keyword Tool and click here for Google's new Beta version.

AdWords is Google's pay-per-click advertising service. But you don't have to be an AdWords customer to use their Keyword Tool. And it's free. Aren't they generous?

The Keyword Tool shows you how many people are searching for what words (related to whatever you type in the search box). It also shows you how strong the competition is for particularly words and phrases. Very handy.

So type in the words that relate best to your core products or services and research away.

Spy on your competition

The box where you can type in a website address offers a great opportunity to see what keywords your competitors use (competitors being those that offer the same kinds of products and or services to the same kind of target market).

Looking at the keywords of websites by those competitors who are already highly ranked can give some useful clues.

Spiffy keyword finding tools

If you don't mind spending some money to get a closer look at what might work best for you, Wordtracker is one of the best known keyword research tools.

Note: You will find that keyword research software companies generally offer a free trial. Plunder at your leisure.

But according to Top Ten Reviews, the best keyword analysis software is:

1. Web CEO (over over 707,000 businesses currently rely on it…Lordy)
2. Advanced Web Ranking (the company who made ABR is from Romania, which must be embarrassing because heaps of people are using this software but don't like to admit it)
3. iBusiness promoter (from the more respectable country of Germany, these people say that you will be in the top 10 of Google or get your money back – except that their clients might be too afraid to ask for their money back because the company is German)

Well, that's the first three. Check out the rest here. 

Other popular packages include:

• Market Samurai
• SEO Elite 
• Good Keywords
• Keyword Spy
• Keyword Discovery

Trawl through at will.

How do I use keywords on my site?

My God, are you still awake? My hat off to you. As a reward for your persistence, we are going to 'hold that thought'. You can go and have a nap now. 

But I'll be back next post to answer your sage question. If you don't apply this keyword caper correctly search engines can penalise you in ways you haven't even imagined.

Google might be a cute name but do the wrong thing and, man, they can get ugly. 

Stay close.

This post was written by Megan Hills.  Megan is a writer, cartoonist, marketing consultant who wonders whether Goldilocks was ever the butt of a blonde joke. Find out more about Megan.

Let's start from the beginning. What does SEO really mean? 

• I originally thought it represented the names of the cars I have owned: 
  Sam, Eric and Owen
   
• Certain people lacking social skills think it means: 
  Starship Enterprise's Oscillator

• A small town in Croatia known for their philosophical bent believe it means: 
  some endless osmosis…
   
• It's the acronym for the name of an unusual environmental group – who deny climate change – called:  
  Sun Earth Ostrich
   
• The French insist that it means:  
  séance en oeufs (seance in eggs)  

But today we are in the marketing zone. So here SEO means…..

…drumroll…

Search engine optimisation!

How exciting. All clear, then? No? Okay…

It's not a particularly warm and fuzzy term, I'll grant you that. But if you say 'I want to be on the first page of Google', you will be yelling the same SEO mantra as 99% of the people out there.

Where you appear on a certain Google page determines how many people will find you online. That's why being on the first page of Google is the prayer of the twenty-first century.

The big question people forget to ask…

Being on the first page of Google is all very well. But the thing people often forget to ask is this: the first page by what search words?

Type in 'My Marketing Thing' and I'm top of the page. Yay! But that doesn't help me if I'm trying to reach people who don't know about My Marketing Thing yet.

Type in 'marketing and Blink' ('Blink' is a book by Malcolm Gladwell talked about in an earlier post) and I don't have a hope in hell of being on the first page of Google. Why? Because the big publishers and distributors involved in selling 'Blink' have taken up that first page. And they will probably continue to for awhile yet.

Why do the big guys get the ranking?

The longer you have been around online, the higher your ranking is likely to be. The bigger you are (i.e. lots of traffic on your site and other people listing your web address on their site), the higher your ranking is also likely to be. 

My Marketing Thing is relatively new and relatively small. So my ranking isn't hey-wow fabulous right now.  Well, that's one excuse. There is another big reason why my ranking isn't so hot…yet. And I unveil it very soon – read on!

Happy news for My Marketing Thing

'Marketing coke cartoon' (an image related to my chat about Blink) got me on the first page. Yay! Okay, the likelihood of someone typing in 'Marketing coke cartoon' is much smaller than 'marketing and Blink'. But you do what you can.

One key SEO rule is: try to find niche areas, not highly competitively broad areas.

But we need to stop here for a moment. There's a confession I have to make…

My SEO confession

I would rather have interesting and creative un-search-friendly words than boring and predictable search-friendly words. Search-friendly words are known as 'key words' or 'key phrases'.

I really should have titled my 'Briefing your web dude' series as 'How to brief a web builder'. Why? Because who is going to type into Google 'Briefing your web dude'? No one. Zip-a-dee-doo-dah.

But I wanted the word 'Dude'. And Goddamnit, I was going to have it.  

My stubborn creative soul does tend to fight this SEO business. But I do have some other strategies that might bring me that ranking without losing the fun bit.

Some shocking news about SEO

There are all manner of things that can apparently raise your page ranking, but….regardless of what SEO experts tell you…nothing has been actually proven.

Note: Apart from getting on the first page of Google via Adwords (pay-per-click advertising). But we will get to that in due course.

What's next?

The next post will give you (in a happy-go-lucky nutshell) the stuff that SEO experts suggest as 'the thing to do' to nab your position on The First Page.

Hey, it's good to know your options and play around with them. I've already used a good many of these babies.

Later I'll also share with you my secret strategy on how to avoid looking like a tedious key-word contortionist – and still get a place in Google's good books.  

This post was written by Megan Hills.  Megan is a writer, cartoonist, marketing consultant who begrudgingly admits that SEO is the devil we need to get to know (buy him a drink, ask about his weekend, that kind of thing). Find out more about Megan.